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DATE RAPE:

On The Rise?

Real Women-Real Stories

by Coco Diong

January 25, 2018

In this time of the #Me Too Movement, statistics show that date rape is on the rise and more women are coming forward to talk, who were victims of date rape and didn’t report it to the police.  I interviewed four women who stated their reasons.  The names have been changed to protect their privacy.

Sherry: “I was at a sales convention with my boss, and I was thrilled to be there, because it was in Hawaii, and it was my first time going to Hawaii.  I was like a little girl in a toy store.  I was twenty-six at the time, and I oohed and ahhed at everything I saw.  One night, he took me to dinner, and insisted that I order lobster, which I did.  I had never tasted lobster before, and I expressed it profusely.  He also ordered Cristal champagne, and by the end of the evening, I felt like a princess.  I was very grateful, and I kept thanking him over and over again for a lovely evening.  When he insisted on walking me back to my room, I began to feel uneasy, but I played it off.  When we got to my door, he suddenly burst into the room with me, pushed me on the bed, and told me that he was going to show me how I could really express my gratitude.  He proceeded to rape me, in spite of my tears and protests, and then threatened to fire me if I told anyone.  I didn’t tell and I didn’t quit the job until a year later.  I didn’t tell because I was embarrassed and I didn’t think anyone would believe me.  After all, he was a respectable businessman and I was a mere secretary.” 

Claudia – “I was raped by a co-worker, when the company took the management staff away for a weekend retreat.  I had been secretly admiring him for some time, and it seemed he didn’t notice me until that weekend.  We stayed in the bar drinking long after everyone else went to bed.  And when he suggested that we go back to his room to play chess, I was game.  But as soon, as he closed the door, he began to undress, and when I tried to leave, he blocked the door, slapped my face and brutally raped me repeatedly.  When he finally let me go, I ran out of his room with my clothes in my arms.  I pretended to be sick the next day, and went home.  I never told anyone because I felt stupid and degraded.  I was also afraid of him.  Every time I passed him at work, he would wink at me, and I hated myself for being such a coward.  Then one day, I told my favorite male cousin about it and he had some thug friends from the “hood” corner this guy one night after he was leaving his favorite bar.  They robbed him and beat him up pretty badly. He was in the hospital for a week, and I finally felt vindicated. But I still didn’t report it to the police, because I blamed myself for voluntarily going to his room in the first place.”  

Jill – “I was away at a business conference in another city, and I met a very prominent businessman, who happened to also be handsome and single.  He picked me out of a crowd, and I was flattered because of who he was, and we ended up having dinner and drinks.  When he offered to walk me back to my hotel room I thought he was being a gentleman.  However, when we reached my room, he asked to use the bathroom.”  But, when he came out, he was all over me.  He raped me and when he finished, he went in the bathroom, washed his hands and left out the door without a word.  I was devastated, and before this day I had never told anyone.  I didn’t report it because I was embarrassed and I didn’t think anyone would believe me because of he was.”

Merri – “I was out on a 2nd date with a guy who behaved like a gentleman all evening.  When he brought me home, and invited himself in for drinks, I felt no apprehension about letting him in.  I liked him and it was apparent that the feeling was mutual.  But as soon as he entered my home, he turned into a madman.  He grabbed me by my hair, dragged me into the bedroom, and raped me.  When he left, I called my girlfriend crying, and she convinced me not to call the police, because it would cause me too much embarrassment since I had allowed him in.    I regret that decision now.”

Do you have such a secret?  If so, tell someone regardless of when it happened.  If nothing else, you’ll release the burden of secret pain, and the offender could still be punished.

 

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