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OVERHEARD…

“A beautiful woman has to know she’s beautiful, be grateful for it, and feel gratified with it in order to be truly beautiful.  I know a number of women with beautiful hair, skin, eyes, and body.  But their heads are on so crooked that their beauty disappears in a matter of minutes.”

“I used to suffer from loneliness until I got a boyfriend.  Now I suffer from anxiety and insecurity, as I worry daily about who he’s with and what he’s doing.  I don’t know which one is worse.  I don’t trust him, but I don’t want to be without him.”

“I was in an abusive relationship with a man who used to slap me hard across the face every time I disagreed with him.  I would cry silently and never say a word.  I was scared to stop seeing him, because I thought he’d kill me.  Then one day when I finally made up my mind to move on and told him, he raised his hand to hit me.  With his arm in midair, I grabbed it with all my might, and told him in a very calm voice, that he couldn’t hit me no more, because I knew how sound he slept.  I knew that the combination of my calmness and the veiled threat would scare him…and it did.  I never heard from him again.”

“A major rule in relationships that I think most folks don’t understand is when you break up with someone, you can never say in the same breath or conversation, ‘Hopefully, we can be friends.’  It’s like saying, I never really had any real feelings for you and now that I’ve discovered that, I don’t want you to be mad. I want you to be my friend instead.”

“When I meet a man with possible romantic potential, I make a quick assessment to see if he’s worth investing any mind time in.  One of the things I look at is his car.  A man’s car tells you a lot about him.  If a guy drives a Benz, he’s into being impressive, and is usually very traditional.  If he drives a Lexus, he’s usually vogue and stylish.  If he drives a Porsche, he’s rich and self-indulgent.  However, regardless of what kind of car he drives, if it’s over six years old, I take a pass.”

“Give me a Southern man any day.  They are raised up from little boys to honor and respect women.  Even the worst scoundrels do you in gentlemanly fashion.”

“I believe women tell men too much in relationships, especially about past relationships.  When I meet a new guy, I create the aura of pure sexual virtue, though I’ve been married twice.  As far as I’m concerned, the past is irrelevant to any future encounters.”

“Since I stopped sleeping with every “romance encounter” my phone rings far more than it ever did when I was sexually active.  Now I know what it feels like to be a challenge.”

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