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Bonita’s Blog



by Bonita Bennett

I listened quietly as my luncheon companion spoke softly about her life and how unhappy she’d been.  Our agenda had been business oriented, but as is common with women after dessert has been ordered, we began talking about our personal lives.  Outwardly, she seemed to have it all.  Her clothes were of a distinct quality, and she had that successful look that is not always evident on women of her ilk.

When the discussion turned to men and the various challenges associated with dealing with them, tears fell as she spoke of physical abuse from an ex-husband, a bitter divorce, subsequent disappointing relationships with men and women and an overall unhappy existence.

The sadness on her face distracted greatly from the exquisiteness of her makeup.  She spoke of a current involvement with a very prominent man, who abused her in public  on more than one occasion…yet she could not find the power to end the relationship.  When I asked if she were afraid of him, she bowed her head and didn’t respond right away.  After what seemed like an eternity of silence, she lifted her head slowly and said, “I’m more afraid of being alone.  My family and I are not close and I don’t really have any friends or no one else to talk to about the issues of my heart.”

Unfortunately, her story is not unique.  Across this country, women are dying spiritually in unhealthy relationships or situations, and existing in the dark.  Much of this is due to them feeling entrapped by a variety of fears and not having a kindred soul to speak and entrust their hearts to.  This talk occurred in the early spring, and soon after that meeting, this woman called to say she had been making more friends because she had been extending herself…and that she was free at last, from the burden of needing a man to feel whole.  She contributed her newfound freedom to a change in her thinking about what happiness meant to her.   I find that too many women suffer in silence and fail to embrace the value of soul-sharing with a true friend.  May all of us value and appreciate the friend we already have who’s truly interested in our heart matters or embrace the one we might need to become in the New Year.

Bonita Bennett, publisher  Of Being Single Magazine and a former TV/radio personality, is the author of  the books “How To Catch & Keep The Man Of Your Dreams,”  and The Coming Of Dawn.  She is also a nationally recognized life coach/relationship expert, and noted motivational speaker, whose life-changing counseling techniques, classes and innovative workshops on life-skills, inter-personal relationships, conflict management, and problem solving are well-known in her field.  Bonita Bennett is the publisher and founder of Being Single Magazine       Be sure to get your copy of  her two books…Meanwhile, read the  excerpts from the mystery novel…The Coming of Dawn and How To Catch & Keep The Man Of Your DreamsThe Smart Woman’s Guide To Romance.

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