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Before You Marry

Read This!

by James Collin, DD

It is common for most when we’re in trouble to call out for God’s help.  However, it seems we only wish to allow Him to be in charge of that which we feel we have no control over.  But if God’s guidance was included in one of life’s most important decisions, such as marriage, the divorce statistics would drop drastically.  I learned this the hard way.

 I got married in a church, but the church wasn’t in me or my wife.  For us, divorce was imminent, because neither of us understood what we were doing and what love really meant, or what it took to live with another person.

Many of us grow tired of waiting on Mr/Ms. Right and often opt for what’s close by or available.  Marriage needs two things in order to survive, sincere love for one another and God’s sanction of the union.  When a man or woman aches or longs to be married, the wait can be very, very difficult, but it must be understood that any delay encountered is for your own good.

As long as we walk humbly, submissively, and obediently, we need not worry that we’ll somehow miss God’s direction about which way is the best way.  Here are some practical points to consider before jumping the broom.

  • What is your mate committed to?  Hopefully, it’s you.
  • Does your potential mate show restraint when angered?  Is he/she addicted to sex, work, alcohol or excess spending?
  • Does your mate show affection to your satisfaction?
  • Are your mate’s inner qualities more attractive than the outer qualities?
  • Is he/she a responsible person?  The glow of romance dies quickly when one’s partner does not rise to the occasion when responsible action is needed.
  • Is he/she really a good “catch?” or are you just tired of going it alone?
  • Don’t rush into marriage.  Take your time and evaluate your decision.  Make sure you have no doubts before you say, I do.  Marriage is much easier to get into than it is to get out of.  Every man and woman I know who had doubts before marriage, made a terrible mistake by going through with the marriage.  In each case, all of the marriages ended in divorce soon after the vows were uttered.
  • Most importantly, don’t marry without premarital counseling.  It’ll make a world of difference in your life together.  It’s one of the smartest moves a couple could ever make concerning their future together.

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