by Sarah Smart
Q. I went out with a guy recently for the first time, who was impressive. We went to dinner and later to the movies, and I had a lovely time. However, everything went south when we left the theater. A woman appeared out of nowhere and accosted us angrily. She claimed to be his fiancée and accused him of cheating on her. I left him arguing with her. Later, he called and claimed the woman was an ex-girlfriend who wouldn’t let go of the relationship. Since that time, he has been begging me to go out with him again, but I refused. I don’t want to get caught up in his drama, and my instincts are telling me to take a pass, though he’s tempting. My friends think I’m crazy because he’s single and therefore, fair game. Would you go out with him again?
A. No! In my opinion, if the ex is bold enough to accost him publicly, there’s no telling what she’s capable of. I wouldn’t want to be in the line of fire for her next appearance.
Q: Recently, I accepted a position making more money than I’ve ever made (6 figures), which I was very excited about until I met my boss. My stomach dropped when we were introduced because eight years ago he tried to rape me. I was taking an art class at a local college and he was a fellow student. I accepted a lift from him one night when my car suddenly stopped three blocks from the school after he appeared out of nowhere. When I got into his car, he turned down a dark alley, stopped the car and attempted to rape me. I got away by pulling a cigarette lighter out of my pocket, setting his jacket on fire and jumping out the car. I didn’t report it when it happened, but I want to report it now, and still take the position. My family thinks I should forego the position if I’m going to report the incident because it will be my word against his and it won’t be worth the drama. What would you do?
A. I would forego the position and put the incident behind me again. I wouldn’t want to work for the guy and I wouldn’t want to go through the drama of accusation and denial
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