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Social Signals And What They Say…

by Theo McNee

On more than one occasion, I’ve had a woman flirt openly with me from across a room, and when I approached her, she acted as if she was clueless.  Recently, while watching a game at a sports bar one evening with a group of friends, a beautiful woman across the bar began staring at me so boldly and provocatively that it became disruptive to my serious concentration.  

She was so fine, I felt compelled to stop watching the game and go over in response to her body signals and/or body language.   However, when I tried to return the flirtation, she became aloof and non-communicative, as if she couldn’t imagine why I was there.

She stared straight ahead without ever looking at me and grunted a response as if she were preoccupied with her drink.  When I attempted to plod through the cold cloud that seemed to have suddenly come upon her, by asking if she were alone, she snapped as if insulted and replied very curtly, “Why? Do I look alone?”

I shrunk back in a confused state and walked away wondering if perhaps I had misinterpreted her body language.   However, when I returned to the group and told of my experience, no one was surprised.   They all assured me in a compassionate tone that her eye play had been directed toward me. After that incident,  I took a poll among my most learned brothers who agreed on how a woman’s outward behavior on the social scene speaks volumes about her experience and attitude.

Aloof behavior says:

  • “I’ve had some hard times with men, and I’m afraid of them.”
  • It’s been awhile since I’ve been with a guy, and I don’t really know what to say or how to act.”
  • “I’ve been hurt and I’m afraid of being hurt again.”
  • “He’s too good-looking to want me, so he must be a player.”
  • “If I act too friendly, he’ll think he can take advantage of me.”
  • “I don’t want to appear like I have no one.”
  •  “He couldn’t want me, I’m not pretty enough.”

A friendly manner says:

  • “I’m comfortable with myself.”
  • “I trust my judgment.”
  • “I like men, and I’m not afraid to show it.”
  • “I’m out to meet new people and perhaps new friends.”
  • “I’m out to have fun.”
  • “I’m accustomed to getting attention from a man.”
  • “I like me. Why shouldn’t he?”
  • “I’m not afraid of men.”

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