Dating vs. Danger – Dignity Denied

Dating vs. Danger

Dignity Denied

by Jan Pitts

I remember being excited once after meeting this great-looking guy and our first date was at a party on a yacht. He was fun, accomplished, and seemed sincere. I was captivated momentarily by his brilliance until I sat across from him over dinner. Though I was mesmerized by his smile, I realized by his conversation that he had low regard for women. When the waitress mistakingly messed up his drink order, he referred to her as a “stupid b***h,” I knew it wouldn’t be long before he called me one.  I blocked his number as soon as I got home.

Not long ago, I was sitting in a very lovely room in a magnificent home with a group of five women gathered to plan an upcoming event.  Suddenly, the front door flung open, and the live-in boyfriend of our host stormed in and demanded all of us to leave.   (One woman in the group left out so fast, that she left her purse behind).  It was obvious that he was angry, and all we wanted to do was get out of his path of fury.

As we stood paralyzed in shock on the sidewalk outside, we became even more flabbergasted when the front door opened, and the man threw his girlfriend out the door and slammed it shut.  It was bitter cold outside, and she didn’t have a coat on. We watched sadly, as she shivered, screamed, and pleaded to be let back into her home.  Later, we learned he was known for his cruelty, but for her, leaving him was not an option “because she had invested too much time and money in the relationship.”

I personally know a number of women who suffer physical and emotional abuse at the hands of their lovers and go back for more. Unfortunately, they are among many who are willing to scrap their souls and self-respect under the theme of “love” and/or “need.”

Statistics show that there are millions of single women across this country being emotionally and physically abused in relationships, and they are hanging on for dear life, and using the “Love” word as a life raft.  Some feel trapped, but don’t know what to do about it. They hate the abuse, but they love the man.  Some feel unworthy of tender affection because they’ve never experienced it.   Others saw it coming early in the relationship but pressed past it in hopes that their “love” could affect his bad behavior. Too many women see warning signs but choose to push them away with romantic idealism.

If more women backed out at the first sign of trouble in a relationship, the statistics of emotional abuse would drop drastically. If you or someone you know is experiencing physical or emotional abuse in a relationship, please contact The National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-7233