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The 8 Step Guide To Mingling Well …

 by Bonita Bennett

  • You Can Go Out Alone. Be adventurous.  Special occasions and/or events are meant to be shared.  However, if your birthday rolls around, and you don’t have a date or friends whose company you wish to be in, dress in your hottest outfit and go to a fabulous restaurant alone.  My cousin did it and had a wonderful evening.  The waiters catered to her every whim all evening, and she ended up being asked out by the handsome chef in the kitchen.
  • Be Refreshing. When you’re out conversing socially, never pretend to know what you don’t.  It’s considered smart to admit what you don’t know, and even sexy when you seek to know more about what you don’t know.
  • Don’t Misinterpret. Pay attention and listen well.  If he/she says they’re just looking for a friend, stay alert.  He/she is probably not interested in making a love connection with you.  Therefore, if you are…don’t force the feeling.
  • Lay Off The Hunt. Stop trying to figure out where you can go and meet the man/woman of your dreams. When it’s your time or turn, it can and will happen anywhere…at the gas pump…train stop, or in a waiting room.  Just stay in the lookout position.  In other words, don’t go looking for love, when it’s your turn, love will find you.  Remember, the look of hunger is a chase-away.
  • Be Nice. Be careful how you discard an undesirable date.  You never know when you may run into him/her again.  A friend went on a blind date once with a guy, who bluntly told her at the end of the evening that she wasn’t his type because he wasn’t into “big women.”  She was crushed, but pressed on. Two years later, unknowingly, he sat before her applying for a high-paying position in her office, and she enjoyed telling him she wasn’t accepting any more resumes.  It is very important to practice making others feel valuable because Karma is always on the case.
  • Pack Your Manners: For Men – Never assume a woman is too liberated to appreciate chivalry in a man.  Gentleman manners indicate the guy didn’t grow up in a barn and he knows how to treat a woman. Most women expect a guy to get out of his car to let them in and out.  The problem is that too many women are just so happy he showed up that he isn’t required to do much else.  Remember, we teach others how to treat us at all times.  Ladies:  If you’re at a party and you invited him, offer to fix his plate.
  • Practice Your Focus Face. Be careful not to let your eyes wander from a person’s face when they are talking directly to you.  It can be offensive and a serious indicator that you don’t find the person interesting enough to pay attention to.  One way to be really conscious of this is to imagine it happening to you.
  • Take Your Tongue Monitor. Never make unfavorable comments or repeat a negative rumor about someone in mixed company.  If you expect to be considered a class act, you must keep watch over what you say.  You really are judged by the quality of the words that come out of your mouth.  Keep this in mind no matter where you are.

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