The Triangle War:
Inside The Battle For Love
by Jovan Tahale
Not too long ago, my cousin and I were sitting in a restaurant enjoying lunch with a mutual friend. Ironically, we were in the middle of a discussion on how smart women do dumb things, when we heard a loud noise coming from a table behind us. When we turned around, we saw a very well-dressed woman, standing over another woman whose face she had just slapped. The man at the table was in the process of trying to keep them apart, as the “slapper” screamed insults and obscenities at the woman for being out with her man. Of course, the table got turned over in the course of him trying to keep the violence down, as waiters came from all over the restaurant to assist.
Eventually, the police were called, and the “slapper” ended up being hauled away in a squadron, with her once coiffed hair and designer clothes in total disarray. We watched, as the manager helped move the very embarrassed couple to a more secluded corner, and the atmosphere slipped right back into normalcy as if nothing happened.
As we turned back to resume the conversation at our table, I shot a “that could have very well happened to you” look at my friend, whose eyes suddenly began to well up with tears. It turned out she had called this meeting to tell us that she had just learned she was pregnant, and the reaction of her boyfriend had not been supportive. My cousin and I shot each other knowing looks because we weren’t surprised at the boyfriend’s reaction. We believed simultaneously without conversing, that our friend had probably gotten pregnant on purpose to up the odds of winning him away from the arms of another woman.
We were suspicious because she had been involved in a very tumultuous triangle for over a year, where she competed openly with no holds barred for the sporadic affection of a man she claimed to love. Unfortunately, this had not been a trap where she had fallen in love with a man, believing she was in a monogamous relationship, and later learned he was cheating on her with someone else. She knew from the beginning that he had another woman, because he informed her on their first date. However, she convinced herself she had the power to win him away…but thus far, nothing had changed.
Meanwhile, she suffered all the indignities associated with being in a triangle relationship, up to and including catching the other woman driving her car, after she loaned it to him. Yet, she still held on to the hope that one day she’d win, and they would eventually marry and ride off into the sunset together.
Unfortunately, these cases are not unique in today’s world of women competing for the same man. Some compete without knowing who the competition is by name, while others compete openly with threats and violence. The police records are filled with cases where women are physically challenging each other for the affections of a man, in more ways than one. A few years ago, there appeared to be a sudden epidemic across the country where young women (21-34) were killing each other in a triangle war over a man, who was more than likely spreading his “love” in more than two places.
There are also those who compete financially…from buying expensive gifts (watches, vacations and cars) to luxury homes on a hill, depending on their income bracket. I personally know of at least three women who are knowingly involved in a triangle relationship where all three of the guys are single, and basically upfront about their other attachments. When I tried to interview them for this article, they all refused comment except to say more or less, that they were in love, and sometimes it was worth fighting for as long as the man was single and not legally attached.
Years ago, a co-worker was stabbed through the heart by a woman she knew was also dating her boyfriend. She and the woman had been in a physical altercation before, when the woman walked up on her and the boyfriend at a party. She warned her then to stay away from him, but she underestimated her threats, and ended up losing her life.
I wonder…is the threat of physical harm worth it in the battle for love? Unfortunately, some seem to think so.