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What To Do

When You Meet

Someone New

by Sierra Silverspoon

Think Friendship First.  Start out on a friendship tone when you meet a new interest.  Don’t rush into the romance thing too soon. I used to envision each new handsome face I met on my arm before the first martini arrived.  I also dated too many guys I ended up not liking as a person because I was blinded by the glamour of their outward “package.”

  • Don’t Be Overly Sensitized.  Everyone can’t feel your flavor.  Play it loose. Everyone has the type he/she is attracted to, and sometimes we fail to fall into that category.  This fact should never be taken personally.  If you meet a guy/girl, and it doesn’t work out, it simply means it wasn’t supposed to work out.  It took me a long time to learn this lesson.  I was often caught up in feeling rejected, unqualified, and less than, whenever I didn’t get a follow-up call after a first date, but I know better now. 
  • Don’t be mirror obsessed.  If you’re a woman on a first date, don’t run to the ladies’ room every five minutes to check your face.  Many guys see this action as being overly self-conscious, which translates to low self-esteem and a lack of self-confidence.
  • Don’t overuse your imagination.  Don’t create your own definition of his/her words, and don’t interpret perceived signals to fit your mode of thinking. Never try to rationalize what you don’t understand regarding his/her behavior.  Seek clear-cut answers to whatever questions you may have by simply asking.
  • Don’t become obsessed with what he/she thinks of you.  It’s what you think of you that counts. Trust your instincts for the truth to be apparent and take what is said with an open mind until he/she proves otherwise. Meanwhile, don’t cling to every word spoken like it’s a life raft. On the second date with a dream guy type, he informed me that he didn’t like women who wore fake hair and I went home and threw all my wigs away. Unfortunately, the relationship didn’t pass the one-month mark.

 

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