Date Ready? – Here Are 5 Ways To Tell…

Date Ready?

5 Ways To Tell

by Lisa Laird

• How Open Are You?

When my friend first pointed Don out across the room and said she wanted me to meet him, I balked. I could tell long distance that he was not my type. He was too tall for me and I could hear his laughter from across the room. He seemed boisterous and I preferred guys who were low-key with a cool exterior. “He’s not my type!” I told her dismissively. “What about the guy standing next to him on the right?” I asked with a wink.

He was more my type. He was lean, the right height and I liked the way he was dressed. “He’s married and he’s a jerk!” She said laughing. “Come on,” she insisted. “You’ll love Don.” Remember, smart women, don’t judge books by their covers. They dig into the “pages” before they make a judgment!” It turned out she was right. Don was an absolute delight, and we ended up dating for over two years. The relationship ended when he got another girl pregnant.

• Your Expectations

Studies show that single women spend far more time concentrating on “being in love” than men.  Anything can set us off and remind us that we have no one, i.e., weddings, Christenings, dinner parties, etc.  On the other hand, men as a rule fight hard to occupy their time with things that are fun and enjoyable and the lack of special interest in their lives do not dominate their thoughts, or, in those cases where it does, it’s not as apparent.  

• The Dialogue

When Candy goes out to dinner for the first time with a potential romantic interest, she always uses dialogue as the criterion for future involvement with this person.  This dialogue, she states is important because both parties have a grand interest in impressing each other and if they don’t succeed on the first time out, they’re in trouble.  “There is far too much emphasis on hormonal reaction to a person than what that person has to say,” says Candy. 

“If we paid more attention to those first encounters, we would save ourselves a lot of pain and frustration down the road.”  Example: If a person spends the entire evening discussing their various dislikes, that tells you that the person is going to be hard to please.   This could also indicate that this person is very critical and would more than likely be a pain to deal with regardless of how attractive he or she is.  Therefore, it is important to listen rather than gape at that gorgeous face across the table.  It could be a smart alternative to future disappointments.

• The History Test  

If his/her conversations are laced with references to her ex-wife or ex-lover, you may be asking for trouble.  If you’re here (in the present) and they’re still back there, stuck in an old relationship that doesn’t exist, the future is grim.  If a man still discusses the last woman in his life, he’s probably still subconsciously involved with her.  The same applies to a woman.

• The Crisis Test. 

What does he/she do when you get fired, burned out, or fall down the stairs and breaks a leg?  Does he/she stop their world and get off and be with you in your time of need?  Sacrifice in the name of love represents the best test of care and concern.