An Inside Look At Date Rape

An Inside Look

At Date Rape

by Coco Diong

More women are coming forward to tell about being victims of date rape who didn’t report it to the police.  I interviewed four women who stated their reasons.

Sherry: “I was at a sales convention with my boss, and I was thrilled to be there, because it was in Hawaii, and it was my first time going to Hawaii.  I was like a little girl in a toy store.  I was twenty-six at the time and super-impressed with everything I saw.  One night, he took me to dinner and insisted I order lobster, which I did.  I had never tasted lobster before, and I expressed it profusely.  He also ordered Cristal champagne, and by the end of the evening, I felt like a princess.  I was very grateful, and I kept thanking him over and over for a lovely evening. 

“When he insisted on walking me back to my room, I began to feel uneasy, but I played it off.  When we got to my door, he suddenly burst into the room with me, pushed me onto the bed, and said he was going to show me how I could really express my gratitude.  He proceeded to rape me, in spite of my tears and protests, and then threatened to fire me if I told anyone.  I didn’t tell and I didn’t quit the job until a year later.  I didn’t tell because I was embarrassed and I didn’t think anyone would believe me.  He was a respected businessman and I was a mere secretary.”

Claudia – “I was raped by a co-worker when the company took the management staff away for a weekend retreat.  I had been secretly admiring him for some time, and it seemed he didn’t notice me until that weekend.  We stayed in the bar drinking long after everyone else had gone to bed.  He confessed that he really liked me and had been wanting to ask me out. Therefore, when he suggested we go back to his room to play chess, I was up for it. 

“But as soon, as he closed the door, he began to undress, and when I tried to leave, he blocked the door, slapped my face, and brutally raped me repeatedly.  When he finally let me go, I ran out of his room with my clothes in my arms.  I pretended to be sick the next day and went home.  I never told anyone because I felt stupid and degraded.  I was also afraid of him.  Every time I passed him at work, he would wink at me, and I hated myself for being such a coward.  I  didn’t report it to the police, because I blamed myself for voluntarily going to his room in the first place.” 

Jill – “I was away at a business conference in another city, and I met a very prominent businessman, who happened to also be handsome and single.  He picked me out of a crowd, and I was flattered when he invited me to have dinner with him. When he offered to walk me back to my hotel room I thought he was just being a gentleman.  When we reached my door, he asked to use the bathroom, and when he came out, he was all over me.  He raped me and when he finished, he left out the door without a word.  I was devastated, and before this day I had never told anyone.  I didn’t report it because I was embarrassed and I didn’t think anyone would believe me because of who he was.”

Maura – “I was out on a 2^nd date with a guy who behaved like a gentleman all evening.  When he brought me home and invited himself in for drinks, I felt no apprehension about letting him in.  I liked him and it was apparent that the feeling was mutual.  But as soon as he entered my home, he turned into a madman.  He grabbed me by my hair, dragged me into the bedroom, and raped me.  When he left, I called my girlfriend crying, and she convinced me not to call the police because it would cause me too much embarrassment since I had allowed him in.   I have never stopped regretting that decision.”

What about you? Are you carrying such a secret?  If so, tell someone regardless of when it happened.  If nothing else, you’ll release the burden of secret pain, and the offender could still be punished.