I’m very attracted to the friend of a woman I date from time to time and I want to pursue the feeling.
by Sarah Smart
October 26, 2018
Q. I’ve been dating a woman on an infrequent basis, (friends with benefits) who recently introduced me to her friend who just moved here from out of state. The chemistry was strong between us, as we both stood trying to play off the attraction. She was hot and my problem is that I want to ask her out, but I’m concerned about hurting the other girl’s feelings. We’re not serious, but she wants to be. However, I feel if I advance on her friend, she’ll be shattered. Right now, I think I should follow my instincts. What do you think?
A. Since a man has to live with himself first before he can be of any good to anyone, I would suggest you pass on this one. You already feel guilty and you haven’t acted yet. Since you and your “friend” don’t share the same feelings about your relationship, you’re already in troubled waters. If you insist on pursuing this mentally, you should discontinue the relationship with the first girl and allow an appropriate amount of time to pass before you seek out her friend.
Q. I met a very attractive woman at work who I took out one time. After the date, which was a horror experience, I explained I had decided to become exclusive in the relationship I was already in. Since that time, she has pursued me relentlessly, and won’t take no for an answer. At work, she calls me constantly and has even followed me into the men’s room. Two weeks ago, she rang my doorbell late one night, barged into my house when I opened the door, and tried to force herself on me. I ended up throwing her out bodily. My problem is that I haven’t told anyone at work about her behavior, but I think I should file an official complaint against her before she really gets out of hand. What do you say?
A. I think you’re right. I think her aggressive behavior could easily be considered sexual harassment, and therefore should be documented and brought to the attention of your employer. Who knows, she could break in on you while you’re asleep. Be careful out there.
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