I’m miserable living with my boyfriend because he doesn’t want to get married and I do.
by Sarah Smart
November 8, 2018
Q. I am 37 and have never been married. I am currently living with my boyfriend of two years, because he preferred living together to getting married. I’m miserable because I really want to get married, and I don’t want to live with him indefinitely. I also don’t want to lose him because we can’t agree on this one issue. What do you think I should do?
A. End the misery and move out or stay with him and remain miserable. You need to probably see which state of misery hurts the worst…the one you have living with him, or the one living without him. either way, the great lesson here is that you gave away your self-esteem and your personal power, when you went against your desires. So either live with it or get going. You can’t have both unless you change your mind about your needs.
Q. I am dating a man who recently lost his job, and he is forever broke. He is now hinting that he may have to give up his apartment if he doesn’t find another job soon, and I know he is hoping to move in with me. The problem is that I’m ready to book, but I don’t want to dump him while he’s down on his luck. He was never the greatest boyfriend in the world to begin with, and it’s hard to have a lot of sympathy for him now that he’s lost his independent state. What would you do?
A. Change the relationship status by moving from romance to friendship. I would tell him candidly that I feel it’s time to move in another direction, but that I would still be available to him as a friend.
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