SingleScenes

I’m skeptical about marrying a guy who seems to be everything I could want, but my gut tells me I’d be making a mistake.  Something about him just doesn’t feel right.

by Sarah Smart

February 12, 2019

Q:  After having sexual relationships all my life with no meaning, I decided two years ago to abstain until I got married.  I was tired of hot nights and lonely days.  Four months ago, I met a guy who has shown me a love that I’ve never experienced.  He’s handsome, stable and generous…and he has asked me to marry him.  He is willing to do it without knowing me sexually.  The problem is that there is something about him that tells me I would be making a mistake if I married him.  For all appearances, he is everything I’d want in a husband.  But I’m leery, because it just doesn’t feel right. What would you do?

A:  You failed to mention whether or not you loved him.  But I must tell you, based on my experience, if you have doubts of any kind, don’t do it.  Marriage is a serious step that should not be entered into with any mysterious or unexplained discomfort.  Follow your gut…it’s never wrong.

Q:  Two months ago, my best friend’s brother gave me a lift home from a chess match, and my boyfriend rang the door bell five minutes after I got in the house.  When I opened the door, he slapped me hard and accused me of my best friend’s brother.  When I started crying, he got down on his knees and apologized profusely, explaining that when he drove up and saw me getting out of another man’s car, he went ballistic because he realized he loved me and he couldn’t stand seeing me with someone else.  I’ve been waiting so long to hear those words, that I quickly forgave him since he had never hit me before.  However, since that time he has become more possessive, and I’m afraid be might hit me again, but I’m afraid to leave him.  What do you think?

A:  I think you should get out while you can.  Once a guy hits you, and you accept it, you open yourself up to get hit again.  A man who can hit a woman once can hit a woman again.  Possessive people can make your life miserable.  Real love is gentle, kind and without slaps.

Got a problem or a confession?  We’ve got the answer.  Send us your scenarios regarding The Single Life to beingsinglemagazine@gmail.com and put SingleScenes in the subject line.