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8 Things To
Consider Before
You Marry

by Edward Hall, D.D.

When my friend Kent decided to marry for the third time, I wasn’t surprised.   As a longtime friend, who had chronicled his previous bouts with marriage, I knew he still had no understanding of what he was doing.  He was getting married because he didn’t enjoy living alone and his current girlfriend lucked out because she happened to be current when the marriage bug hit him again.  

Unfortunately, when I suggested he pray about his decision to marry, he balked at the idea.  “Man, I don’t need to pray about getting married.  This ain’t no life or death situation.  I know what I’m doing!”   Ironically, it was the same identical comment he made twice before when he got married. Each marriage lasted less than four months.

Marriage needs two things in order to survive, (survive meaning that two people live together in wedded bliss and their existence together is not a miserable one or one that is void of joy and contentment) sincere love for one another and God’s sanction of the union.  Just like we pray and wait on the Lord to heal a loved one, not let someone die or bless our monetary need, we must do the same when choosing a mate for life (and we must not forget that God intends it to be for life). 

Here are 8 practical points to consider before marriage.

  1. Does your potential mate show restraint when angered? Is he/she addicted to alcohol, drugs, food, sex, work, sports, or impulse spending?
  2. Does your mate show affection?
  3. Are your mate’s inner qualities more attractive than the outer qualities?
  4. Is he/she a responsible person? The glow of romance dies quickly when one’s partner does not rise to the occasion when responsible action is needed.
  5. Are you a good “catch”? Would you make a good marriage partner for someone considering marriage?
  6. Don’t rush! Take your time and evaluate your choice.  Make sure you have no doubts before you say, I do.  Marriage is much easier to get into than it is to get out of.  Every man and woman I know who had doubts before marriage made a terrible mistake by going through with the marriage.  In each case, all of the marriages ended in divorce or tragically.
  7. Trust God and wait on His direction and don’t confuse it with what you think you want. And when you pray, pray expectantly.  Don’t let a miracle pass you by.
  8. Don’t marry without premarital counseling. It’ll make a world of difference in your life together.  It’s one of the smartest moves a couple could make.




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