Point Of View
The Draw Of The Drama Dude
by Sierra Silverspoon
Some years ago, I was quite taken by a guy I met at a Super Bowl party. He was tall, fine and aloof. Therefore, when he chose me out of the crowd of beautiful people, I was very flattered. (Later, I learned that you should never begin a relationship feeling flattered by the attention of your partner.) We began dating and he started out as a bad boy, by not showing up when he said he would, and being evasive about his behavior. But I plodded along, treasuring every moment that hinted of real interest, until he became bored and disappeared. What’s the fascination? Are we drawn to the drama dude out of some need to straighten him out? I don’t think so. I believe some of us are just fascinated with scraps of affection by the guy we can’t figure out.
Myth Or Not? Too often, the nice guys get rejected. The drama dude is more prone to get a woman’s attention and her affection. Once the nice guy can be fully identified (and categorized) as being too nice, the relationship begins to go into a slow nosedive. The woman usually parachutes out of the falling love-craft, and proceeds to hope for and prepare for another “fantasy flight” with a guy who has more edge to him.
The “flight” with the drama dude dips and flips. Though the ride gets bumpy, sometimes it’s a smooth ride. Like the Blue Angels, the U.S. Navy’s precision flying team, the drama dude will take you through some fascinating loops and twirls across the sky of romance. Excitement at its absolute best! It’s a pure challenge just to stay aboard. You may become anxious, irritated, puzzled, or even angry. But one thing is certain: You’re never bored.
The drama dude usually has strong sex appeal. However, as much as we disdain some of his behavior, there’s something about him that we cannot resist. He presents a definite challenge! He offers something vastly different from the “norm.” He brings with him an unlimited (unpredictable) amount of thrills. There is ever present that unspoken hint of danger – danger that our hearts will be broken; that things might backfire, leaving us abandoned. With the bad guy, one never knows. Living on the edge has a way of making life a titillating experience; a state of mind that goes hand-in-hand with attempting to sustain a relationship with the likes of him.
However, if women are to be successful in becoming involved with good guys, we need to first examine ourselves. True excitement comes from dealing with a man of character. A guy, whose sole purpose in life is not to see how much agony he can put you through, but one whose moral fabric is strong, true and durable. The real content of a man’s personality and purpose can be seen and heard early on if we take the time to look, listen more closely and appreciate what we see..