The Other Side Of Living Together

The Other Side

Of Living Together

by Coco Diong

June 13, 2018

When my neighbor told me that she was selling her house to move in with her boyfriend, I suggested she rent it out instead, just in case the relationship took an unexpected curve.  Luckily, she took my advice.  Six months after she moved in with him, she came home unexpectedly from work and caught him in a very indiscreet position with another woman.  Here are other true stories.

• Tom and Cheryl were involved three years when Tom decided to move in with Cheryl. The agreement was that they would split all the bills down the middle.  This agreement worked fine, until Tom lost his job seven months later, and was unable to find work.  After five months of footing all the bills, Cheryl asked Tom to move out of the apartment, because she wanted to end the relationship.  When he refused, she changed the locks on the door while he was out, and wouldn’t let him back in.  Tom, who claimed he had nowhere to go, called the police, and all they would do was accompany him back to the apartment to get his clothes and other belongings.  The police told him that since they weren’t married, there was nothing he could do.

 

• Beth and Chuck had been dating four years when they decided to buy a home together. The plan was to marry after Chuck’s divorce became final.  Though Beth shared the house payments, Chuck’s name was the only name on the mortgage due to her credit issues.  Two years after they moved into the house, Chuck informed her he decided to reconcile with his wife because she had become ill and she would have to move out of the home by the next day, because his wife was moving in.  Beth had no grounds to stand on legally.  She refused to leave and the police were called to assist her in leaving.

 

• Bob and Christy, a committed couple, had been together five years. They decided to pool their money and buy a condo together. Christy had filed bankruptcy before, so they decided to put the condo in Bob’s name.  When Christy’s mother warned her against the action, she told her mother she trusted Bob completely, and she knew he would be fair to her if anything happened between them.  Two years later, Bob announced to Christy that he had to sell the condo because it was about to go into foreclosure.  He confessed he had not been paying the mortgage, because of a gambling problem.  She also learned he had refinanced the condo a few times and didn’t share the equity he’d gotten out of it.  Unfortunately, because her name wasn’t on anything, he was able to operate autonomously, and she was left out in the cold.

These stories are indicative of the many challenges singles face when they enter into financial bonds with no legal leg to stand on.  Studies show that many singles today who are financially stable are opting to live together rather than marry.  Some see it as a way to protect their bank accounts and assets against the possibility of divorce.  After one woman ended up having to pay her ex-husband alimony, she vowed to never marry again.

Marriage does not guarantee happiness, but it does guarantee certain rights when a couple decides to legalize their relationship. However, if a couple decides not to marry, but to live together, they should have a clear understanding of the laws in their state as it relates to common law relationships, and what rights they have, if any.