by M.K. Allison
October 15, 2018
On our very first date, the handsome guy sitting across from me in the dimly lit bar candidly expressed “his truth.” He was already dating two women, but he enjoyed making “new friends.” I was disappointed because I had high hopes for this encounter. I smiled and told him I had enough friends. As I stood to leave, I felt powerful.
Women who have high self-esteem will not and do not share their men. WHO then is willing? According to studies, women who share men are not necessarily willing, but often feel they have little or no choice, if they don’t wish to be alone. Or.. they personally feel they have what it takes to swing Joe or Johnny over to where he should be. An interesting side to this scenario is that more and more men are being honest about their multiple involvements, therefore, giving prospective playmates the option in advance of refusing to participate.
The irony is that many women when given this information opt to participate anyway under the deceptive banner of “we can still be friends.” While the women who choose to move on after receipt of the same information, somehow get pursued harder.
What about the guy who has lunch with one woman and dinner with another. Is he happy? No. This guy is having fun, but it is a fleeting thrill. Most times, he’s lonely because his heart does not belong to any one person. He finds it hard to be true to anyone because he is seldom true to himself. With the man who seems to thrive on variety, there appears to be a psychological anchor that pulls on him and convinces him that few men can be content with one woman, particularly if he is inspired by sexual attraction.
The man who seeks to taste the fruit of every tree he passes, often lives with an emptiness which is camouflaged by his many involvements. A mature man knows there is no substitute for the bond between two people who completely satisfy the needs of the other. But the woman who agrees to share the affections of a man bids a high price for maximum aggravation and can expect a yield of minimum pleasure.