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The Road To Romance

8 Steps To Dating Smart

by Sierra Silverspoon

Whenever I use the term, “dating smart,” about myself, my friend Elana always corrects my usage, with her definition of the term. She defines the term to mean that one has decided only to date guys who have money, status, and good looks.  For me, the term means to date under the best conditions and most favorable circumstances.

I know too many singles who jump onto the dating scene without a clue of what they’re doing.  Therefore, I’d like to offer some tips to those who wish to understand the necessities of dating smart and have less headache and aggravation in their chosen relationships. Those who are committed to “dating smart”  usually embrace the following…

  • Never go out on a second date with anyone critical, judgmental, or condemning of you, in any way, on the first date.
  • ‚ Never chastise or scold the children of your date. Those who date smart either mind their own business or make soft suggestions about corrective behavior if asked to do so.
  • ‚If you don’t want to answer a personal question for any reason, say…”I don’t wish to answer that question?” Never sacrifice your comfort level to satisfy someone else’s curiosity or demands.
  • ‚ People, who date smart, never agree to go anywhere or do anything they really don’t want to do.  They don’t surpass their gut feelings or principles to please others.  They are quick to express their true feelings. They never move to the tune of someone else’s music, unless they enjoy the beat.
  • ‚Never assume something you heard or witnessed is true, or let it consume your thoughts…or influence your actions.  Hold out for the facts before concluding any matter.  This is a common occurrence on the dating scene because many singles are paranoid about ending up with the wrong person.  Those who date smart are prone to be fair-minded.
  • ‚Don’t brag about your accomplishments, achievements, or honors, unless you’re filling out an application or doing a resume.  Humility is very attractive.  Let others discover how great you are naturally.  Also, never pretend to be where you are not on the social ladder.  If you are on a high rung, there’s no need to mention it.  Success and social standing speak for themselves.
  • ‚Never spend your time, energy, or money on someone who does not make you feel special and important to them.  Doing so does not guarantee admiration or acceptance.
  • Your past, personal, and romantic history should only be revealed after the engagement…if then.  Some things are best kept.   This information is only pertinent when deemed as such by the “confessing” party.  One must reserve private secure data for worthy and qualified ears only and even then, there should be a limit to how far you will go in disclosing.
  • Never allow someone to cross your pain threshold without expressing the act of trespass. If you don’t like something that was said or done by the person you’re dating, be sure to express it at the time of the infraction, but do it stylishly.  It will have more impact.



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