Single Sketches – Date Rape: The Secret Seldom Told

Single Sketches – Date Rape: The Secret Seldom Told

by Cheryl Lakes

Statistics show that date rape is usually done by someone the victim knows. Meanwhile, more women are coming forward who were victims of date rape and didn’t report it to the police.  I interviewed four women whose names were changed for privacy.

Sherri:  “I was at a sales convention with my boss, and was thrilled to be there because it was my first time going to Hawaii. When he insisted on walking me back to my room, I began to feel uneasy, but I played it off.  When we got to my door, he suddenly burst into the room with me, pushed me on the bed, and told me that he was going to show me how I could express my gratitude.  He proceeded to rape me, despite my tears and protests, and then threatened to fire me if I told anyone.  I didn’t tell and I didn’t quit the job until a year later.  I didn’t tell because I was embarrassed and I didn’t think anyone would believe me. I still have nightmares about that night.”

Claudia – “I was raped by a co-worker when the company took the management staff away for a weekend retreat.  I had been secretly admiring him for some time, and it seemed he didn’t notice me until that weekend.  We stayed in the bar drinking long after everyone else went to bed.  And when he suggested we go back to his room to play chess, I was game.  But as soon, as he closed the door, he began to undress, and when I tried to leave, he blocked the door, slapped my face, and brutally raped me repeatedly.  When he finally let me go, I ran out of his room with my clothes in my arms.  I pretended to be sick the next day and went home.  I never told anyone because I felt stupid and degraded.  I was also afraid of him.  Every time I passed him at work, he would wink at me, and I hated myself for being such a coward.  I still didn’t report it to the police, because I blamed myself for voluntarily going to his room in the first place.”

Jill – “I was on a first date with a guy I liked, who offered to walk me to my door after he brought me home. However, when we reached the door, he asked me to use my bathroom. When he came out, he pulled a knife and raped me.  When he left out the door, he threatened me if I told anyone.  I was devastated, and before this day I had never told anyone.  I didn’t report it because I was scared and embarrassed.” 

Marcie – “I was out on a 2^nd date with a guy who behaved like a gentleman all evening.  When he brought me home and invited himself in for drinks, I felt no apprehension about letting him in.  I liked him and it was apparent that the feeling was mutual.  But as soon as he entered my home, he turned into a madman.  He grabbed me by my hair, dragged me into the bedroom, and raped me.  When he left, I called my girlfriend crying, and she convinced me not to call the police because it would cause me too much embarrassment since I had allowed him in.    I regret that decision now.”

Do you have such a secret?  If so, tell someone regardless of when it happened.  If nothing else, you’ll release the burden of secret pain, and the offender could still be severely punished.