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So…You Finally
Met “The One.”

by Lisa Laird

Don’t become obsessed with what he/she thinks of you.  It’s what you think of yourself that counts. Trust your instincts for the truth to be apparent and take what is said with an open mind until he/she proves otherwise. Meanwhile, don’t cling to every word spoken like it’s a life raft. On the third date with a dream guy type, he informed me that he didn’t like women who wore fake hair and I went home and threw all my wigs away.

Think friendship first. Start out on a friendship tone when you first meet. Don’t rush into the romance thing too soon.  I used to envision each new handsome, accomplished face I met on my arm permanently before the first martini arrived. I also dated too many guys I ended up not liking as a person because I was blinded by the glamour of their outside “package.”

Control the flow of your feelings. Everyone can’t feel your flavor. We have to always keep in mind that every man/woman has the type of person they’re attracted to, and sometimes we fail to fall into that category.  This fact should never be taken personally.  If you meet a guy/girl, and it doesn’t work out, it simply means it wasn’t supposed to. It took me a long time to learn this lesson.  I was often caught up in feeling rejected, unqualified, and less than, whenever I didn’t get a follow-up call after a first date or when a relationship didn’t pan out.  But I know better now.

Don’t overwork your imagination. Try not to create your own definition of his/her words, and don’t interpret whatever signs you see to fit your mode of thinking.  If you don’t understand, seek clarification. Never try to rationalize what you don’t comprehend regarding his/her behavior.  Again, seek clear-cut answers to whatever questions you may have in the beginning by simply asking.

The authenticity test. Everybody who looks good acts well and talks well ain’t necessarily good.  I’ve been fooled by the best, and I had to learn the lesson by being bumped on the head several times.  It’s not what he/she drives, but what he/she hides.  When we meet someone interesting, we must pay close attention and look below the surface to discover the real person.

Photo Credit: Prostooleh

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